Hope

We went out to the Relay for Life at the middle school here in Okemos on Saturday. We did not start a team as I had been planning, because I just couldn't fathom the "hopeful" spirit that one needs to raise funds. I do support the American Cancer Society's philosophy...after all, if you don't have hope then why bother. But we had hoped for so much more. Seven months? Please. Couldn't we even get a year? A Christmas? Another birthday, maybe?

We did want to donate to the cause, though, so we brought some money with the intention of supporting some teams by eating chocolate. We told Emma it was going to be like a party, and it sort of was! There was a clown making balloon animals (better than I can, sorry to say), a few bake sales, some games, and kids crafts. Emma made some sand art in a Coke bottle, won some candy at a basketball toss, lost the candy while we were walking around, and had a tantrum. While she was rolling around on the ground, I bought a luminary for Pam, then we went home for a nap.

That evening I went back for the luminary ceremony. It was very emotional for me...I remember at last year's relay in Grand Ledge, all I could think about was whether Pam would be around this year.During the silent lap, they had a bagpipe playing...at the end of the lap he started Amazing Grace. I'm sure there were other people crying, but it was dark...I pretended I was walking with Pam for a moment, and I tried to summon up some hope. There were a few survivors walking, after all, and they certainly need it.