March 19th

Today would have been Pammie's 52nd birthday. She was 2 weeks younger than me, I remember us comiserating as we both approached our 50th. Who would have ever believed that would be her last birthday? To remember Pam today, I went to 8:00 Mass at Holy Name of Mary. The gospel was the story of Mary and Joseph and how Joseph dealt with finding out that his wife to be was already pregnant (March 19th is feast of St. Joseph). It tells how he planned to quietly divorce her and then an angel came and told him that the baby was to be Jesus Christ. In the sermon, the priest said that a lot of things that happen in life do not make sense, that we do not understand and are not within what we thought were the "plans" we had for our life. Could there be a truer statement? It strengthens my faith that when I am sad, I go to church and the sermon seems to be talking to me directly,
It is still hard to understand why Pammie only had 50 years. So now I take comfort in the warm and funny and wonderful memories I have of time spent with Pammie. I believe that God picks his most beautiful flowers first. I believe that Pam is in a better place and I know that someday I will see her again and get one of her amazing hugs and hopefully then I will understand.
Happy Birthday Auntie Pammie! Love you!

Birthdays and Love

Sunday was Emma's fourth birthday, and we had her party at Harris Nature Center. I knew she probably wanted a girlie cake, but I couldn't see mingling the Disney Princesses with the turtles and snakes. So I suggested a ladybug theme, and she thought that was just fine. I borrowed a dome shaped pan from Aunt Laura, and dyed some white frosting very, very red. Just before I began to decorate it, Emma announced that she changed her mind, and wanted Ariel instead. I said, "Honey, if you can figure out how to make Ariel out of a dome-shaped cake and red and black frosting, then I will do it." She agreed that the ladybug was a better choice.

Pam would have LOVED that cake. Mom tells me that when I was young, my sister would decorate my birthday cakes to match the napkins. The only one I remember (probably because I saw the picture) was Pebbles from the Flintstones. It was a white cake with a perfect replica of the napkin...and it's not like she used store bought frosting! She dyed every color and used my mom's icing press. She was SO good. And let me tell you, she NEVER was late with a birthday card. Ever. I wish I could say the same about myself, but in reality, she usually just got a phone call. I did manage to get her a meaningful gift for her 50th, a donation to the Seeing Eye. Between that and the family party at the dinner theater, I am comforted by the fact that she felt loved.

Michael Buble

A very short blog. Every time I hear Michael Buble, I think of Pam. And it makes me smile!!