March 19th

Today would have been Pammie's 52nd birthday. She was 2 weeks younger than me, I remember us comiserating as we both approached our 50th. Who would have ever believed that would be her last birthday? To remember Pam today, I went to 8:00 Mass at Holy Name of Mary. The gospel was the story of Mary and Joseph and how Joseph dealt with finding out that his wife to be was already pregnant (March 19th is feast of St. Joseph). It tells how he planned to quietly divorce her and then an angel came and told him that the baby was to be Jesus Christ. In the sermon, the priest said that a lot of things that happen in life do not make sense, that we do not understand and are not within what we thought were the "plans" we had for our life. Could there be a truer statement? It strengthens my faith that when I am sad, I go to church and the sermon seems to be talking to me directly,
It is still hard to understand why Pammie only had 50 years. So now I take comfort in the warm and funny and wonderful memories I have of time spent with Pammie. I believe that God picks his most beautiful flowers first. I believe that Pam is in a better place and I know that someday I will see her again and get one of her amazing hugs and hopefully then I will understand.
Happy Birthday Auntie Pammie! Love you!

Birthdays and Love

Sunday was Emma's fourth birthday, and we had her party at Harris Nature Center. I knew she probably wanted a girlie cake, but I couldn't see mingling the Disney Princesses with the turtles and snakes. So I suggested a ladybug theme, and she thought that was just fine. I borrowed a dome shaped pan from Aunt Laura, and dyed some white frosting very, very red. Just before I began to decorate it, Emma announced that she changed her mind, and wanted Ariel instead. I said, "Honey, if you can figure out how to make Ariel out of a dome-shaped cake and red and black frosting, then I will do it." She agreed that the ladybug was a better choice.

Pam would have LOVED that cake. Mom tells me that when I was young, my sister would decorate my birthday cakes to match the napkins. The only one I remember (probably because I saw the picture) was Pebbles from the Flintstones. It was a white cake with a perfect replica of the napkin...and it's not like she used store bought frosting! She dyed every color and used my mom's icing press. She was SO good. And let me tell you, she NEVER was late with a birthday card. Ever. I wish I could say the same about myself, but in reality, she usually just got a phone call. I did manage to get her a meaningful gift for her 50th, a donation to the Seeing Eye. Between that and the family party at the dinner theater, I am comforted by the fact that she felt loved.

Michael Buble

A very short blog. Every time I hear Michael Buble, I think of Pam. And it makes me smile!!

Ooooh Baby.

A few weeks ago I was filling the bathtub and decided to add a little baby oil to the water. I thought it would might help with that wintry dry skin, and make me feel a little more summery. Well, it's been a while since I used it, but I found a bottle in the hall closet with the kids' shampoo and lotions. As soon as I opened the cap I could picture Pam standing in front of me, in a bikini! :) Are you laughing yet?

It was a typical summer day, circa 1976. Pam and I would put on our bathing suits and drag the chaise lounges (green and white, if I remember correctly) from under the porch, and lay together in the hot mid-day sun. We'd lay on our towels so we didn't stick to the plastic. She would use that baby oil liberally as a tanning aid, and end up brown from head to toe. Ah, the days before we started talking about SPF! We would take a dip in the pool once in a while to cool off, and then she'd oil up again. I wasn't allowed to use it...I had to put on Coppertone, which in those days wasn't much better. But Mom did allow Pam to put lemon juice in my hair to lighten it up. Even then she was very concerned with how my hair (and hers) was styled and colored.

It's amazing how something so simple can bring back such a strong memory. But then again, Pam never was forgettable.

How Pam is always with me in the workplace.....

Pam has been on my mind again a lot lately. I always think of Pam at least once when I am working everyday. After Chris and I got married Pam explained to me the best way to explain to students how to pronounce my new last name.

1) D'An like Dan
2) con like ice cream cone
3) a

Works like a charm every time I introduce myself.

Family

Family is so important. Creating memories and sharing experiences and being there when you are needed is what it is all about. I just came from a memorial service for a 2nd cousin who passed away at the too young age of 54. His parents, siblings, children, relatives and friends are devastated. He was very accomplished in his life, but the favorite remembrances of those who spoke at the service were of sharing family dinners and happy times spent together.
Pam really understood the importance of family. Her favorite times were having all her children in her house at the same time. She loved taking care of them and just being with them. She lived for trips to Michigan or for Meg and family to come here.
I cannot go to any funeral or memorial service without thinking about Pam. I sadly can feel the pain of the family in the front row. I feel for them for the agony they have been through and the difficult times ahead, as the family struggles to continue on with a hole so large you can never imagine it closing.
I love my family. I look forward to family get togethers. I want Eddie to have an endless supply of happy memories of time spent with family. God Bless our family!

Christmas 1998

Dear Family and Friends,

Happiest of Holidays to you and your families! 1998 sure was the “turn around” year for our family. Julien took a transfer back to New York (as Director of Finance and Business Operations) so in July we packed up our gang (once again) and headed on back home. We had already sold our house in NY, so we were ever so grateful to be able to rent a townhouse with our 3 beasts (1 mean the dogs, not the kids). New Hampshire was wonderful and we felt sad leaving family and friends behind, but we got a great opportunity to go back “home” — and so we did!

The kids are doing great - and we’re back in the same town that we left 1 year ago, so the transition back into school was an easy one. Chris is in the 1(9” grade, about 6’2”, 175 lbs. or so and spends all of his spare time doing an internship at the local cable station taping t.v. shows. He’s already thinking about college and has high hopes for what he would like to do, but will need some “big” scholarships if he chooses a private university. Stephanie is in 8th grade, and just began training for “Track & Field” events so that she can become part of the spring track team at school. Believe it or not, she is learning to pole vault (yes, that’s right) and jump the hurdles. Miracles never cease! She got her braces on her teeth in April and finds it quite the fashion trend to visit the orthodontist to change the color of her bands. Nick is 10 years old and weighs in at about 110 lbs. He just finished his first year of football and has found his “niche” in this sport. He is proud that he never missed one of the 50 some-odd practices, nor missed any of the games won the “Coach Gallo Award” for this accomplishment. He and Steph are both now playing town basketball and it seems that just as one sport ends another has already begun.

We had a crazy summer as Julien was working in NY for 6 weeks before the family could move and then we moved in with my folks for 2 weeks until our place was ready. I’m sure they could tell you some stories to curl your hair, along with the one about us arriving at their house on a Friday night with 2 cars UI, 3 kids, 3 dogs, I bird, and oh — Julien and myself too! We were able to get a few days away as a family and went up to Maine to my Aunt Glady’ s camp to visit family we hadn’t seen in “way too long.” My sister Meg was home from Michigan at the same time and she, too, came along in the van with the dog and us as we headed on north. The kids and Meg made a “royal” attempt to water ski and Steph and Meg were the only ones in our family who got up to an actual standing position! We had a great time visiting with cousins, fishing, picking blueberries and just relaxing.
This was a busy year for me too! I’m back volunteering as the secretary of the “puppy club”, and the newest member (dog) to our family is Atlas, a “white” golden retriever who is a hefty 90 lbs. already! Our club took a trip to Hershey Park, PA with the dogs in September and it was quite a “hoot” riding the monorail and other rides with our dogs. We sure left a lasting impression! I am back working at the middle school in town, but now my official title is “intramural coach” and I work ½ the day running a sports program for the students during their lunch periods. I sure blow a mean whistle and have learned a lot about refereeing games. Who’d ever think — sports and me in the same sentence! I also officially turned 40 this year — and to prove I can do “anything’ went out and bought my first tent. I’m going to get this gang to go camping, no matter what, but I’ve not yet figured out how I can plug in my hair dryer out in the woods!

We’re hoping to be in a house sometime this coming year, and are all looking forward to spending more time with our families again!

God Bless you all .... you’re all loved and missed! Have a Merry Christmas and a safe, New Year!

Love,Pam & Company